Sexual Fantasies…

It was a warm mid afternoon, sun shining through clear skies. We sat there for a while after lunch, talking about life and pasts and sharing thoughts on different subjects. It was comfortable and peaceful. We’d kiss between conversations with slight and subtle touching… grazing my inner thigh… leaning in to touch my neck… tracing his fingers with my lips… I bent down to check my phone in my bag and as I looked up he was checking out the waiter from the table next to us walking away. I smiled and he smiled back, knowing that I caught him.

I was supposed be jealous, but I wasn’t… on the contrary seeing the lust for her as he bit his lips looking at her turned me on. I wrote something on a napkin on the table and folded it, then moved closer to him, kissed him softly and gave him the folded napkin while whispering in his ears to go give it to her. He looked at me with astonished eyes, but went for it. I watched him flirt with her and smoothly gave her the napkin, she opened it and looked at me and winked…

On the napkin was our hotel address we booked for the weekend.

We went back to the hotel shortly after and while he was in the shower the phone rang, there is someone here to see u, let her up I said. He came out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist to open the door and there she was… He was still damp and glowing and looked at me with joyfully surprised to see her and so was I.

He shut the door behind her and laid her on the bed beside me, and…

This was my fantasy they other day and it kept reoccurring.

I think I could safely assume that a lot of men fantasize about being in a threesome with two women, and what man wouldn’t… two women, two vaginas, and four tits… . Many women, on the other hand, think that if her partner asked for a threesome it’s because he just wants to sleep with other women and oppose the suggestion out of jealousy or that they can’t accept the notion of women on women. But personally the idea really turns me on… the feeling of desiring two people or being desired by two people at the same time is euphoric. I would not identify as bi and I have never been with a women before, but oh my the smoothness, the softness, the firmness, the moans of a women…

Not only for the girl on girl action… the kinkiest of my fantasies is actually wanting to watch my partner have sex with someone else… watching him flirt, kiss, taste or tease someone else… give pleasure to someone else… the thought of him thinking of me or better looking at me while receiving pleasure or fucking another women… it’s just arousing to my core. Not so many would respectfully apprehend it and understandably so, even I don’t understand where it stems from. Maybe I like the competition or that it amplifies that my partner is sexually attractive not only to me or maybe it’s the thrill of it… or probably I am just fucked-up somewhere inside, I don’t know.

I would not mind two men either, although I don’t know if I would ever actually do it, the thought of being lusted for by two men at the same time feels both arousing and empowering, but they probably call it the Devil’s threesome for a reason… Nevertheless,  for me the confidence of a man sharing his women with someone else, without judgment nor disrespect and not to slut her around nor humiliate her, but to satisfy her more, makes him actually more attractive, more respectful and trusting and trustworthy than men who claim possession or control.

All this is not something I have ever dared to share out loud with anyone; my husband was never open to even joking about any of that… But I did share it with someone and as much as it was liberating, it still scars me that I did sometimes… the judgment, the stigma… my respect! Sharing this part of myself with him still both excites and scares me, for it is indeed a long road away from the judgemental environment I was always surrounded by and from the conservative appearance that I was obliged to pretend my whole life…

Nevertheless, he has now become part of my fantasies, my arousals and … and who knows, maybe one day we actually would do that!

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