A Stay-at-Home-Mom going Insane

It is difficult for people to comprehend, how lonely one gets when you are surrounded by people most of the time (well little people)… and how is it that I want to run away from the ones I cannot imagine living without? But is it mentally and emotionally exhausting and I don't even feel like... Continue Reading →

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Married Single Parent … lost in that space in-between

Although we have been together for over a decade, raised children and shared a home, I don't believe we ever really had a marriage... we have never had a we or us relationship, never a unified position! It wasn't until recently that I was able to truly really admit that to myself that I have been waiting for this... Continue Reading →

The awkwardness of reconnecting…

It is very strange when you grow close to someone and then you suddenly detach, and the more time passes the more awkward it becomes to randomly get in touch again. He used a word a couple of months back… disconnect... and what a descriptive word it is. As harmless as it may seam, it carries... Continue Reading →

Flashbacks of my Infidelity…

Two weeks have passed and I think it is finally sinking in. It was my first time with anyone else in 14 years... and it took almost 14 days for it to start to soak in and feel real. He’s my first kiss, my first fuck and my first (and probably last) crush during my marriage. I never thought... Continue Reading →

Stay or Leave a Cold Marriage?

Would you rather stay in a marriage for the sake of your children, a marriage where you lack intimacy and passion and where you do not get to show your kids what a healthy loving relationship looks like and maybe expand you family for the better interest of your child or would you rather leave... Continue Reading →

Someone who loved me better

I could’ve been with someone who didn’t make me feel so unhappy and suppressed all the time. I could’ve been with a person who treated me well, which I have learnt is apparently a right not a privilege. I could’ve had something better with someone who loved me better. I should've been in an non-abusive non-threatening... Continue Reading →

Relationships Cycle vs Mine

Everyone changes over time and so do marriages. The cycles in marriages could either bring a couple closer together or makes them grow more distant. Although we get into relationships thinking they should be the securest and most reliable entity, they are very precarious... just one wrong turn and they go down... A healthy cycle... Continue Reading →

A weekend without him…

He left and I can breath... the colours of the apartment changed, that smoggy cloud that hazed up the place and this heavy halo suffocating me slowly faded away! It’s just for three days, but I could use three days of vivid light and weightless oxygen. I own my space and time without a judgmental... Continue Reading →

Why do we bring Children into this World?

In his book, Born A Crime, Trevor Noah the comedian talks about his mother. He says that she wanted to have a child to experience unconditional love; growing up she didn’t feel loved by her parents and she wanted to be unconditionally loved. Different people have children for different reason, which runs through the complete... Continue Reading →

I cried when he touched me…

I only wanted to say no, but didn’t… I couldn’t stop imagining his reaction to the rejection... the looks of anger and disappointment after... the guilt trips; that I am turning every good moment into a negative... the blame; that I am the one who doesn’t want or know how to enjoy the moment. I... Continue Reading →

The Road to Ultimate Happiness from Within

I get it, I get it... So ultimate ‘happiness from within’ is reaching a state of complete non-dependency from all external emotional, physical and materialistic needs... Wait what?!? So in order to achieve that, we need to abstain from every craving we have! Or do we need to turn every craving to a mere want,... Continue Reading →

The Impact of Narcissistic Parents

Every since I was a child I have tried to explain my strange relationship with mother, a guilt-filled love-hate relationship. Although one’s life is their own choices and they have to own up to them, I believe that the way children are nurtured is what makes them who they are; their decisions, attitude, fears, cravings, interactions, how they express or understand love, … all of it is a result of how they were raised and their relationship with their parents. They shape them!! So people are an accumulated result of their ancestors and the tree goes back to the beginning of humanity and that is the only reason why anyone can say that life is predetermined and one’s fate is already written. Thus, if a divine power has knowledge of all the humans ever lived, by default they would easily know, putting aside the complexity of the matrix of course, how people’s life would turn out to be!

So she cannot really bare the burden of who I am, it’s it my entire line of ancestors, both maternal and paternal who have shaped who I am.

MakeItUltra™

By Dr. Perry, PhD


“Somehow I believed it was my obligation to try and do the right thing by her because she had given birth to me.” ~D.G. Kaye

It is an understatement to state that parenting is difficult. It is perhaps the only job a person can get that is full-time and for life without having all the requisite skills and qualifications. The responsibility is great. One must equip a child with all the necessary tools they will need in adulthood to forge their own lives. It is a self-less relationship that most parents take great pride in. From the moment their child is born, the child becomes the focal point of the family unit. While this is a non-issue to most couples, what happens when one of the parents lacks empathy and is unable to see the importance in anyone else’s feelings or interests?

Perhaps you were raised by…

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Another child to my broken marriage

I projected my life on someone... I know, I know ...I shouldn’t have. I don’t really know if people with drama and issues in their lives should even be allowed to give advise, because somehow there has to be even a small ounce of projection in there! And that is probably what I did even... Continue Reading →

Giving someone their Space

Giving someone space means that you are giving them away-time for themselves; time to reflect, decide, consider options and/or focus on themselves, without you being a distraction to their thoughts. And I am… I am honouring his need for disconnection, though it is tougher and stranger than I thought it would be, with the missing... Continue Reading →

Women are Horny..

Conventional wisdom says that women hit their sexual peak in their 30s, and there are several studies that state that. Whether this is true or not is beyond me. However ... i have been recently extra horny. In my late teens i experienced some similar state, but back then I did have the luxury to... Continue Reading →

How are You…? This is how I am..

I do not want one more person to ask how I am or what I am doing in my life nor for a living or else I’ll burst out in screams! I stopped complaining, stopped sharing and I am cocooning into my own self! I say: good... ok... life... stressed... kids... surviving… lack of sleep...... Continue Reading →

Mother-Husband Battle

I know that, at the end of the day, how my life turned out to be is a result of all my choices and that they are all on me... but they were all choices played in someone else’s game! I was born to a single powerhouse mother that made a name for herself through a... Continue Reading →

Virtually Sexual now turning Real

It was only all virtually sexual until that moment... it turned factual.. physical .. alive! It was actually happening ... and it felt nice, it felt right, but it was fast and incomplete and the setting was bad. He left and I went blank, worried about all the non-essential feelings I know don't matter; fear... Continue Reading →

Perfect Imperfections

I was at my weekly cards game with my three closest girl-friends from University. They were trying to convince me that I should start a photography business and that my husband through his critical destructive attitude has screwed my self-esteem throughout the years and they have seen how much I have changed... But anyways... I... Continue Reading →

What does it mean..?

What does it mean when u ask your spouse for a separation and he calls you spoilt and childish! What does it mean when you tell your parter you don't love him anymore he doesn't take you seriously? I told him in the presence of one of his best friends that I do not want to... Continue Reading →

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